CHAPTER 49
Ryan’s POV
With my tongue laced over my lower lip in remembrance of the kiss and how cold Valerie was, I enter through the front door, holding firmly onto my briefcase.
I haven’t been able to get the kiss out of my head, even though I made a resolution to do that when Valerie began to act all cold toward me.
I couldn’t escape from the office earlier to go check up on them again at the hospital but I tried to call her and it wasn’t reachable.
I don’t know if this restlessness is a result of the kiss or worry over her father’s health and the answers we are bound to get at the end of this all.
I just hope the truth about their relationship won’t hurt any of us. If our parents aren’t on good terms with each other, I fear what would happen between Valerie and me.
I hate that side of her, to be honest. I hate to see the disdain in her eyes. We have gone past that stage and I really do not want us to go back to that again.
I have been trying to sort out my feelings too and the reason why I kissed her but I haven’t been able to think of a genuine reason why I did that other than the fact that I wanted her.
I can no longer deny it. She is driving me nuts. The attraction I feel toward her is becoming stronger with each passing second.
At first, I thought it was because I wanted a woman. I thought it was because it’s been a while since I got laid and that was why I was attracted to the woman closest to me; Valerie.
But this is just too much of a normal sexual attraction. I don’t want to go over the line as well but I can’t help it.
I have made a decision, though.
Taking the staircase up, I get to my door within minutes. I turn the doorknob and enter to see the empty room.
I stroll in, closing the door quietly behind me, thinking Valerie must be inside the bathroom. Even if she spent the whole day at the hospital, she ought to be home already because it is late.
When I drop the briefcase without hearing a sound from the bathroom, I pull off my jacket and take long strides toward the bathroom door.
We need to talk. We should talk about the kiss. We shouldn’t keep quiet over something I consider passionate. She might not feel the same way but it’s fine. I have a solution that might make me get over her as quickly as possible.
I place my ears on the door so I can hear the sounds of the running shower but there is nothing. I knock, hoping to hear her answer so I don’t have to open the door.
There is still no answer so I twist the knob and it opens. Slowly, I open the door and peep in. I just want to be sure that she is here.
To my amazement, the shower isn’t running and the bathroom is empty.
Is she not back from the hospital? Has she gone to her parent’s home?
I close the bathroom door and let out an exasperated sigh with my hands akimbo.
Where the hell is she?
I came home for this and she isn’t here. I let out a disgruntled groan.
Walking back to the bed to get my phone, I quickly dialed her number hoping she would pick it up this time.
Fortunately, it rings and she picks up at the second ring.
“Hey”, I say, finding myself suddenly speechless.
“Hi”, her low voice replies, and she falls silent.
“Where are you?” I find my voice after a few breathing in and out. “Are you back from the hospital? I’m sorry I couldn’t come. I just got home and I found…”
“I’m in the house”, she answers, cutting me short.
“The house?” I turn around. “You mean my house?”
“I’m in my room”, she says and disconnects the call.
Without waiting for a second, I drop my phone and dash out of the room, taking extremely long strides toward her room and wondering why she decided to spend the night in her room instead of mine.
Is this because of the kiss? Is she uncomfortable with me now? Should I still go ahead and tell her my decision?
I knock on her door but I get no reply and I open it with impatience. She is lying on her side on the bed. I’m sure she hears the sound of the door opening but she isn’t turning to see if it’s me or someone else.
I close the door quietly behind me and walk slowly toward her, feeling giddy with anxiety.
When I get close, I sit on the ottoman close to her bed and watch her back. She isn’t turning around to face me and she isn’t saying anything.
She must still be sad about her father’s health. I’m sure this has nothing to do with the kiss.
“How is Father? Does he feel better?” I ask, my heart thumping wildly in my ribcage.
Slowly, she turns to me and I see how red-eyed she looks. With a rush, I move towards her and grab her shoulder. “What happened? Why did you cry?”
She chuckles and lets go of my hand on her shoulder by sitting upright. “I wasn’t crying.”
An awkward silence falls between us. I don’t know what else to say to her or if I should go straight to the point on the reason why I wanted to talk to her.
Is this the right time to say this? Won’t I be considered selfish for spilling such a decision at a critical time like this?
“Hmmm…Val….” I trail off and she stands upright, clears the books on the table then sits and faces me.This is property © of NôvelDrama.Org.
A lump of dread gets stuck in my throat and I can’t say anymore. No word is forming in my head.
“Ryan, that kiss was nothing, right?” She demands and I hoist my head up instantly, my eyes wide open.
“You kissed me because you wanted to assure me that everything will be fine, right? Or was it because my mother was coming and you wanted her to think we are good just like we are doing with your mom?”
It takes a while for it all to process slowly in my head and finally I nod, ignoring the sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach.
Now, I can’t say what I came here for.
“I knew it!” She rejoices with a short laugh. Taking a hold of my hand. “We don’t need to pretend to be my mom, you know? Your mom is enough and my mother doesn’t really care if we are real or not. What she wants is her husband’s financial freedom, that’s all.”
I nod without a word.
“Are you ok?” She asks me and I look up to meet her intense gaze. I nod again.
We fall silent again. I release my hands from her hold and ball them into a fist beside me, blaming myself for not being man enough to tell her the truth and kissing her again and again till she gets the message.
I feel stupid for not summoning up the courage even if she rejects my offer.
“I’m sad”, she mutters, lowering her head down.
I do not comment on her statement, I just continue to watch her, speechlessly.
With a deep sigh, she gets up and stands in front of me. “Do you have a motorcycle?”
Surprised at the question she is asking me out of the blue, I gaze up to see how serious she is. “Yes.”
I have one.
“I need some fresh air and a ride”, she begins to walk to the door and I get the message that she wants us to go out tonight on a bike.
Without waiting for an invitation, I rise from the ottoman and rush out to meet her.