I want You Deeper

Another good point. Vanessa decided to relax and focus on the menu. She hadn’t realized how hungry she was until she was considering what she might eat.

A burger was what she really wanted. A big, juicy cheeseburger with fries. But the sodium content on that, not to mention the bulk the food would add, probably wouldn’t be a good idea. She had no idea what Josea had sent for her to wear tomorrow. The sucky thing about being on camera was that it always seemed to emphasize her every flaw.Material © NôvelDrama.Org.

“I’ll take the grilled chicken salad, no croutons,” she said when the server came by to take her order. She slapped the menu shut and handed it over before she could slip up and add some bacon bits in there or something.

Heath ordered one of the more expensive items and handed over the menu to the server. He made no comment about Vanessa’s order, even as she was worrying that he’d think she’d ordered something inexpensive-at least compared to his order-just to save money.

“Tell me something about you.”

The question, spoken as Heath stared intently at her, threw her off a little. She hadn’t realized until that moment just how much not having cameras around changed the dynamic between them. There was no hidden agenda in him asking her this. He wasn’t helping her to flesh out her backstory or become more likable to audiences. He legitimately wanted to know about her.

“What do you want to know?”

She was delaying. She was aware of that. But she wasn’t sure what part of herself she wanted to carefully curate for him.

“Why did you want to be on a reality show?” he asked.

Wow. Straight to the heart of things. She would have a hard time sugarcoating that part of her story.

“I’ve always wanted to be an actress.” She shrugged. “I see it as a stepping-stone.”

“Do reality show stars typically go into movies and stuff afterward?” He genuinely looked confused, so she didn’t take offense to the comment, despite the fact it was literally what everyone had told her since she went on her first reality show casting call. That list of people included her agent, who had strongly suggested she choose one or the other.

“It’s happened before,” she finally answered. “But there are other options. If you become a fan favorite, you can do all kinds of things. You don’t have to be cast in a Hollywood production to be a star now. You can build a social media following, do your own stuff, act in independent films

-”

He held up a hand, looking off to the side as if trying to process what she was saying. “You said something there. Do you want to be a star, or do you want to be an actor? Because they’re two different things.”

She opened her mouth to argue, then closed it again when she had no argument for that. There were most definitely people she’d met who truly loved acting. She’d taken acting classes alongside them. It wasn’t that they were better than she was at it-they just were more likely to steal scenes by being outstanding at their craft. She was the one Hollywood tended to cast in the same role, over and over. The beautiful, but flat, character who mostly stood alongside the hunky main male character.

“I want to perform.”

As soon as she said the words, she realized they were a revelation, even to herself. That described it best. It wasn’t that she wanted people to chase after her in airports or set up entire forums online dedicated to trashing her. Nobody enjoyed that part of it-at least nobody she’d ever met in the business. She was like many of them in that she just wanted people to watch her. Listen to her. Notice she existed.

It was something that had eluded her throughout her life.

But she couldn’t tell Heath any of that. She had to carefully craft her personality for him, showing him only what she wanted him to see. So, instead, she gracefully shifted the conversation to him.

“What do you want?”

The server arrived with their drinks, giving him an excuse to delay. When they were alone again, he answered. “Quiet.”

That wasn’t the answer she’d expected. She set her glass down and folded her hands in her lap. “Quiet?”

He nodded, staring directly at her. “I just want to go back to running my business, not really being talked about. Like it was before. I prefer to operate in the background.”

The fact that what he wanted was completely opposite of her own wishes didn’t escape her attention. It would have been amusing if not for the fact that his stare made her feel all warm inside.

Quickly, she shifted the conversation to work-his work, not hers. By the time the food arrived, he was enthusiastically telling her about his next project, which was a concierge service for businesses participating in trade shows like this one. She actually enjoyed listening to him talk, mainly because he obviously really cared about his work. Plus, it kept the focus off her.

“I think the coast is clear now,” Heath said a full half hour later as they exited the restaurant and entered the hallway they’d snuck down earlier. She had found herself dreading the end of dinner as she longed for more time with him.

“How can you be sure?” Vanessa looked down the long expanse of the hallway. There didn’t seem to be signs of life, but she didn’t trust it. “They could be waiting in the lobby, cameras pointed right at us when we emerge.”

Without warning, he took a sharp left turn. It took her a second to realize he wasn’t still walking alongside her. She doubled back and saw him waiting at the start of a hallway. “Where does this lead?” she asked.

They were walking at a pretty rapid pace. He seemed to know where he was going, even though it was a complete mystery to her.

“Second elevator.” He slowed to a stop and pointed. Sure enough, there was an elevator. He reached over and pressed the up button. “I took it when I came down to ask to change rooms last night.”

“Well, aren’t you handy?” She smiled over at him, then turned to watch the digital readout tick down the numbers. At the same time, it ticked down the minutes she would remain in his company.

“I’ll walk you to your door,” he said as they stepped into the elevator. “You know, I have to make sure there are no cameramen lurking in the hallway up there.”

The doors slid closed, and the elevator started climbing. Her heart rate sped up at the thought of Heath walking her to her door. Like this was an actual date. What if he tried to kiss her goodnight?

Try, nothing. He wouldn’t have to try. If he kissed her, she’d kiss him right back. It probably wouldn’t be the wisest move for her career, but her attraction to him was overruling her professionalism right now. Besides, it wasn’t like he was her real boss. That part of this was pretend.

Her attraction to him was all too real.

Neither of them spoke as they stepped out of the elevator on her floor and started toward her room. It felt like a far longer walk than it had been before. She found that strange. But with the way her heart threatened to pound out of her chest, it wasn’t surprising.

“Thank you for dinner,” she commented as they arrived at her door and she spun to face him.

That was when she saw the way he was looking at her. Staring down at her with that intense gaze he seemed to have lately. Was it attraction? Did she dare assume?

Did she dare initiate a kiss?

“Make sure your key works.”

His comment was so unexpected, it took her a few seconds to process it. She realized she was just standing there, staring up at him, when she should be withdrawing her keycard from her pocket.

“Oh, yes, I should do that.” Hoping he wouldn’t notice her hand was shaking, she grabbed her keycard and inserted it into the slot on the doorknob. A beep and click confirmed it worked. She turned back to him as she pushed down on the lever and slid the door open.

“See you tomorrow.” With those three words, he turned and walked back toward the elevator. The perfect gentleman. So why was she so disappointed that he hadn’t at least tried to kiss her?