Jack Of All Trades (Erotica)

“If you have any questions or need anything please feel free to ask. I’m Becc.”

“Thank you, Becc! I think we are good for now!” Jack said as the Altarians moved off to the bedroom to stow their bags.

With a slight bow the young female turned and left, closing the door behind her.

Jack followed Gee and Bal into the bedroom. He saw there was a large bed with multiple blankets but the room was cool, again a little cooler than they had the rooms in Elleltris.

“I am sorry for our intruding on your sleeping arrangements but Boon Falls is proving to be far colder than the capital. We would freeze at night,” Gee explained.

“No. I get it. It’s fine. It was a little embarrassing to hear you telling Mara about my being warm,” he said.

Gee looked at Jack like he was her slow student. “The Shreen are communal sleepers. They sleep in the pit you see out in the living room. This bed and bedroom are strictly for non-Shreen visitors. Being the ‘warm one’ is a compliment.”

“Oh! Well… thank you!”

“Don’t let it go to your head,” Bal said as she put her suitcase in the corner.

Jack frowned at Bal. “Shall we go eat? I’m starving! I need to stoke the fires that keep you two warm at night.”

“By all means then,” Gee said gesturing to the door.

They found the restaurant and the hostess guided them to a table where an older Shreen couple were seated. Jack could see Tyg’s coloration in the male though his dark fur was peppered with grey and the female had pale grey long fur and snow white short fur with pale grey rosettes and stripes. The male stood and met Jack halfway around the table. He leaned his head forward and Jack touched his forehead to his. The female had moved to stand at her husband’s side when Jack pulled back so he turned and touched her forehead with his as well. She was the first Shreen he had to bend down to as most were as tall as he was if not a little taller. Her eyes were twinkling with happiness as she smiled up at Jack.

“Welcome to Boon Falls! I’m the mayor, Ghen and this is my wife Asha. On a personal note I’d like to thank you for speaking to my son Tyg and his wife the other night. It’s a major relief to his mother and I that the two of them have come to their senses. The good fortune of you visiting when you did and also being a Love Doctor-”Contentt bel0ngs to N0ve/lDrâ/ma.O(r)g!

Gee snorted and wiped at her nose to cover the rude sound.

Jack looked at the mayor in embarrassment. “I’m not a Love Doctor. I’m not an Anything Doctor! I said the words while protesting this fact to some store clerks. I’m not really sure why that phrase became so popular or so wide spread. All I did that night was talk to them. Something in what I said touched the real love they felt for each other and they made it work themselves. They are more responsible for their new happiness than I am.”

The couple looked at him with happy smiles and he realized his denial was falling on deaf ears.

They were standing at a table in the middle of the dining area with maybe twenty other tables around them, most filled with locals having their evening meal. Most of these were watching them casually like they were the night’s entertainment.

At the far side of the restaurant was a large fireplace where flames danced over ornamental glass. Even from the center of the seating area Jack could feel the faint touch of the heat waves being radiated from the fireplace. None of the Shreen were seated anywhere near it as to them it would have been unpleasantly warm. Gee and Bal looked at Jack with just the slightest desperation in their eyes. He understood.

“Mayor Ghen, if you don’t mind I’d like to release Agent’s Gee and Bal,” he gestured to them as he named them, “to sit closer to the fireplace. They’ll have a better view of the room from there and keep warm at the same time.”

“Oh! Well, certainly by all means,” Ghen said as he nodded.

Jack smiled at him and nodded to the agents who immediately made their way to the far edge of the seating area where they found an unoccupied table for two… and moved it much closer to the fireplace. They moved the chairs then quickly took off their fur overcoats and let the heat of the flames soak into their chilled bodies.

The mayor glanced at Jack and they shared a smile. “Altarians don’t care much for the cold, do they?” he said with a crooked smile.

Jack sighed. “No, they don’t. They insisted on coming but I’m regretting that for their sakes. They feel the cold much more than I do.”

Ghen gestured for them to sit but before they could the waitress came by and removed the extra place settings and chairs. She rearranged the remaining settings to give them all equal space. Jack smiled at her quick and efficient motions. Soon the three were sitting with comfortable space around them. The waitress returned with menus.

“I’m really hungry. What do you recommend?” Jack asked her and realized it was Becc.

She smiled and glanced meaningfully at the mayor who leaned forward.

“It has come to my attention that you may enjoy… eating meat?” he said quietly.

Jack’s eyes widened in surprise. “I have been known to. Where did you…”

Ghen grinned at him. “We may be on the Ridge but we aren’t completely cut off from the world. We have ways of learning things even out here in the wilds!”

Asha rolled her eyes and shook her head at her husband. “Tyg called. He and the Queen had a long conversation with her Facilitator. It came up that you’re an omnivore.”

“Oh! Well, yes, I did say that at Tanz’s party.” Jack acknowledged but he still didn’t know where this was going.

“We’ve had a rash of encounters with some larger Skrahak in the nearby hills. When they get big we have to cull them or they get too bold and begin attacking the villages for food. They’re carnivores. Our people have been out in the neighboring hillside hunting them down and we’re close to finding the bull which is the largest one. Once we get it the smaller ones will scatter.”

He looked a little uncomfortable but pushed on. “A few years back we had a group of Wuu visit the village to… hunt the Skrahak.”

Jack looked at the mayor incredulously. “Wuu? The little balls of fur and bad tempers? They hunt?”

Ghen smirked and nodded. “Surprised me too but damn if they aren’t fearsome in a group. They took down a four metre Skrahak and they only had spears. Tiny little spears. Gave me nightmares for a week.” He shuddered.

“Anyway, they took this big one down and proceeded to slaughter it for its meat. They asked the cook here to prepare it and they ate a large portion of the beast that night. Make no mistake, Wuu are pure carnivores.”

“Huh!” Jack exclaimed in surprise.

“We analysed the flesh and it’s perfectly safe for consumption once cooked. As we have culled a number of them recently we have some meat on hand and the chef would be happy to prepare it for you. He said they called it a steak.”

Jack’s mouth watered as he was so hungry. “Would you be ok with me eating it in front of you? If you would I can eat something else.”

“No! Please feel free to enjoy it. The Wuu certainly did,” Ghen remarked.

“That would be wonderful then! I’d love to try a Skrahak steak!” Jack said smiling at Becc.

She leaned closer. “The chef asked me to ask you how you would like it cooked,” she asked.

“What color is the meat uncooked?” Jack asked.

Becc’s nose wrinkled. “Red.”

“Ok, then cook it until it is just slightly pink in the center,” he answered. Becc nodded and looked to the mayor and his wife.

“Our usual,” Asha said and Ghen smiled at his wife.

Becc nodded and went to take the Altarian’s orders but she didn’t get too close to the table.

Jack returned his attention to the couple across the table. “I must confess, up until a few days ago I’d never heard of Chrystan or the Shreen and I feel terrible about that. I’m supposed to be Queen Elissa’s Ambassador!”

“Don’t feel too bad. The Shreen aren’t exactly eager to make a nuisance of ourselves off the planet. In fact I don’t think I’ve ever heard of a Shreen who left Chrystan. We like it here and if we need anything we can’t get here, well, that’s why we have a Gate in Elleltris and friends on the other side to bring those things to us, right?” the mayor said with a shrug.

“Nothing wrong with being, self-sufficient,” Jack agreed and got a smile from the couple.

“We also heard you know more than a little about being self-sufficient but you’ve taken it to extremes!” Asha said in amazement.

Jack looked at her then recalled telling his story about being a Park Ranger. He smiled and nodded. “I did what I had to do to get and keep a job. It was a hard time in my life.”

Ghen glanced over at a neighboring table and frowned at the occupant who was gesturing to him. Jack caught the exchange and glanced questioningly at the mayor who looked a little embarrassed.

“We use the restaurant frequently for town hall meetings and the tables have been equipped with audio systems to allow everyone to properly hear the head table which is this one. Would you mind if I were to turn on the table’s broadcast unit? Everyone here is a friend and they’d love to hear your stories as well.”

Jack looked around the room and saw smiles on the faces of the other Shreen. “Oh! Uh, I suppose that would be fine.”

“The audio is also broadcast for those at home who can’t attend the meetings,” Asha disclosed.

Jack laughed and they looked at him in surprise. “Sorry, it feels like the amateur radio station I worked at when I was a teenager.”

The mayor’s eyes lit up and he gestured to the controls Jack just now recognized on the table. He’d thought they were for summoning the waiter. He smiled and nodded. The mayor pressed and held a spot on the table surface and a light appeared under his finger pad.

“Hello, this is Mayor Ghen at South View with my lovely wife Asha and our special guest Ambassador Jack Danner from Altaria- and originally Earth I suppose,” Ghen said with the smooth practiced voice of a politician and part time radio host.

Jack suddenly realized that during his visit to Chrystan there was a distinct lack of televisions. He wondered if the Shreen just preferred the intimacy of radio. He saw he was being prompted by Ghen.

“Yes, I was born and raised on Earth and only recently found myself living on a different planet. Altaria has been an excellent place to live and now raise a family.” Jack glanced at his ‘audience’ and they were all smiling while they ate their dinners. Some were watching but most didn’t seem to need the visual component. He was fascinated by this but the mayor had moved on.